Blog

5 Leadership Lessons Learned Abroad

December 2, 2019 by Tamara Leave a Comment

The end of the year is one of my favorite times of year, because
it is a time to reflect on the past and plan for the future. At the end of
every year, I set both personal and professional goals, not resolutions.

What’s the difference?

Resolutions are about starting or stopping a new task or behavior, like taking up jogging or cutting back on cake. Goals are tasks or behaviors that are specific (S) and measurable (M), they are achievable (A) and relevant (R), and they are bound by time (T). In other words, they are SMART, so that you can track your progress and hold yourself accountable throughout the year. But this blog isn’t about resolutions and goals, it’s about the impact of living and working abroad.

The end of 2019 also marks the beginning of my third year living abroad in Ireland. So I’ve not only been thinking about my goals, but also on my experience so far and what’s coming next. This is my fifth extended stay abroad, and just like the others, it has come with its highs and lows, and a lot of learning. Living and working abroad has taught me so much about myself and others, and it has also helped me grow and evolve as a leader.

My lifelong passion for travel and culture was ignited by my
first experience abroad, a 6 week cultural exchange program in Spain with my
high school. It was such a powerful experience, not only because it was my
first, but also because it afforded me my first opportunity to think about my
own identity in a more complex way. Just a couple of years later, I was off to
France for a college semester abroad, and it solidified my desire for travel
and intercultural learning. And now, here I am, some thirty years later having
lived in South Korea for a year, Canada for six, and now Ireland.

Ireland is breathtakingly beautiful, and the people have
been incredibly welcoming. The Irish love a good chat, and always up for the craic
(good time, good fun). The Irish way of life has taught me to be more
patient and comfortable with ambiguity. I’ve learned to go with the flow and
trust that things will happen. But it isn’t always been easy, there have been
days, and even months when my time here wasn’t so great.

In fact, each experience abroad has had its own unique challenges
that I’ve had to adjust and adapt to be happy and succeed. I attribute most of
my leadership abilities to my experiences abroad. These experiences that I have
had and the lessons I have learned have been truly transformative and would not
likely have happened without living and working abroad.

In our organizations today, leaders are challenged by the rapid innovation and economic turbulence; it is changing how we work and lead within organizations. Leaders must be able to lead in rapidly changing and diverse conditions, it is essential. Living abroad forces one to flex new muscles, and develop a unique set of skills that leaders today need to be more effective and help their organizations maintain a competitive edge in today’s ever changing world.

Have you considered living and working abroad? Are you doing
it now?

If so, here are 5 important skills I’ve learned and others
can gain from living and working abroad:

#1-Agility: When you live and work abroad, each day presents a new and different experience. Simple tasks like going to the post office or bank become complex, and one must learn deal with what is in front of them, and then develop new behaviors to be effective and appropriate. Leaders are facing new and more complex challenges every day so they must be able to be more responsive, embrace change, and deal with what is and what is possible to thrive in this new era of innovation and instability.

#2-Adaptable: In a new culture, nothing is get done “the way it has always been done” everything is done in a new way so one learns very quickly to adapt. As organizations are forced to restructure, integrate new technologies, and become increasingly more diverse, leaders must be willing and able to flex their attitudes and behaviors to adapt to the needs and demands of their environment. Leaders can no longer rely on “how it’s always been done”, one has to be willing to adapt to new structures, technologies, and people who are different.

#3-Pivot: Every time I’ve lived abroad, something unexpected has happened that has forced me to shift and change my plans. When I was in Canada, I spent a year looking for work, and wasn’t even able to secure a job interview so I went to work for myself. When we try new things, there are going to be mistakes, and often even failures. Leaders must be able to shift to a new strategy and change plans to turn things around. It is (very) often said that “the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results” so we cannot expect better results from the same efforts. As leaders we have to be open and willing to make fundamental changes to increase opportunities for success

#4-Curiosity: When you live in a new country, everything is
new and unfamiliar so it is critical to ones success abroad to assume you know
nothing and have everything to learn. You learn to watch, observe, ask
questions, and listen. You learn patience and humility, and how to be
comfortable with uncertainty and ambiguity. All of which have been vital to my
ability lead international and diverse teams. The desire to learn and know
about anything is a powerful skill and practice for a leader today. It opens
the door to understanding others, solving and analyzing problems, and finding
new opportunities.

#5-Innovate-Each time I’ve lived abroad it has been an
opportunity to start something new, do something new, and become someone new. I
have been able to re-invent myself by pursuing a master’s degree, starting a
business, making new relationships, and contributing to new communities. I have
had to be creative and adventurous, and willing to explore and do something new
to add value to my experience abroad, and my own personal and professional
development. Living and working abroad teaches leaders to execute new ideas
that address real challenges that make a difference and an impact.

So if you are currently living and working abroad, make note
of the challenges you are experiencing, and how they can be used to help you
grow and increase your impact as a leader. If you haven’t had the opportunity
to work or live abroad then it may be a goal you want to set for the next year
or two. There are a growing number of opportunities to live and work abroad, to
help you increase your leadership competencies.

In today’s global world, living and working abroad may be exactly what it takes to become an effective global leader.

3 Steps to Inspire Trust, Respect, and Confidence

February 21, 2019 by Tamara Leave a Comment

Are you taken seriously?

One of the biggest challenges young leaders share with me is the struggle to be taken seriously. Knowing how to establish your credibility with your team, especially when they are older, has proven to an uphill battle.

Do any of these sound familiar?

You share ideas, but folks don’t seem to respond.
You are questioned or challenged on new ideas or improvements.
You are bypassed and folks seek out older staff members, even if they aren’t their supervisor or actually less knowledgeable.

I know you want to be taken seriously and seen as credible by your team. And that takes work. You have got to inspire trust, respect, and confidence in your team. The good news is that it’s possible.

You can start doing something about it now, today. And every day. It doesn’t take a grand gesture to make a difference; all it takes is a series of small actions each day to ensure that you demonstrate clarity, caring, and consistency in your leadership.

#1 Clarity: Be clear about who you are as a leader.

The number one mistake leaders make from day one is leading without identifying a clear approach to leadership. Real leaders know who they are as a leader or at least the type of leader they want to be.

I had to learn to be true myself! And that started with identifying the type of leader that I wanted to be. Once I was clear on the impact I wanted to have on others, and began to lead with my own values, my approach to leadership became both clear and consistent.

One of the most common models of leadership is “Authoritative”, but authoritative leaders are only effective for so long. Eventually, teams will yearn for autonomy and trust and begin to reject and defy and authoritative leadership. I know because I made the same mistake. I was a bossy leader in the early years, and it worked in the beginning, but over time I struggled to have people on my team respect me. Of course, I thought it was them, and over time I began to learn that it was me. And that in fact, I really wanted to lead differently but I just didn’t know how.

Be clear about how you are as a leader and your own approach to leadership.

The first step to Real Leadership is to be clear about how you are as a leader and your own approach to leadership. Once you know who you are, tell your team, and they will know who you are and what to expect.

CLICK HERE to create your own Leadership Identity.

#2 Caring: Let your team know that you care

This is really about having emotional intelligence (EQ), not walking around the office hugging everyone. Simply put, it’s about being self-aware and aware of others. You don’t want to be blindly driven by your own emotions and blindsided by others emotions, with increased EQ you can take the driver’s seat and manage your own emotions and better assess others.

Early in my leadership, I was all business, and I really couldn’t be bothered with figuring out what was going on with everyone else. I just wanted the job done. This was probably the biggest mistake I made as a leader. Humans are emotional beings and we take our emotions with us, everywhere we go. Not only are our emotions with us, but they inform our thoughts, and thus our behavior.

When you are aware and in-control of your emotions, you can be more effective at decision making, problem solving, and leadership.

When you are aware and in-control of your own emotions, you can be more effective at decision making, problem solving, and leadership. Being more self-aware increases your ability to understand others and be more empathetic. The mistake I made was believing that I was able to separate my feelings from my work. I wasn’t, and those who followed me knew it.

When I was able to understand and control my own feelings, it became much easier for me to show them in healthy and productive ways, and to support others in their own emotional self-awareness.

#3 Consistency: Be consistent in your behavior and decision making.

One of the biggest barriers to being taken seriously or seen as credible is inconsistency. In order to trust and respect, your team must able to predict your behavior. They need to know what to expect. So it is imperative that you are consistent in your behavior and decision making. This means you have to walk the talk, and the talk is the “clarity and caring”.

Your approach to leadership or Leadership Identity serves as a foundation, and empowers you with a set of values and beliefs to guide your choices and decision making. It’s a baseline you can use to ensure that your choices are consistent with what you believe and who you say you are.

For example, if you value inclusion and want to be an inclusive leader then you have to be inclusive 100% of the time. It doesn’t mean you can’t make mistakes, but when you do, you have to own your mistakes and work with your team to find a solution.

And if you say you have an open door policy, then your door should always be open. Literally and figuratively, it can’t be a symbolic gesture. Folks have to believe it. It doesn’t mean you can’t set some parameters for your own availability. It isn’t realistic to have people walking in anytime, but it’s about your team knowing that they can come to you for anything.

When teams know what to expect from you, they are more likely to trust and respect you.

A leader who is inconsistent or unpredictable creates chaos and uncertainty for teams, making it hard for others to trust them. When teams know what to expect from you, they are more likely to trust and respect you. People have to be able to count on you, and to be able to inspire people to follow you have to be consistent.

When your team is able to trust you, they will follow you.

When they respect you, they will seek you out for support, knowledge, problem solving.

When are confident in you, they will have your back.

You can start increasing your credibility today by taking steps to ensure that you are leading with clarity, caring, and consistency. Take the first steps by crafting your Leadership Identity, becoming more self-aware, and being consistent. In time, you will start to see a team of people who take your seriously and are ready to follow.

If you want to take a deeper dive into these concepts, check out Real Leadership Online and Real Leadership Live.

Can You Imagine? A shared vision

January 16, 2019 by Tamara Leave a Comment

Imagine your ideal remote team!

My ideal team is consistent, engaged, creative, and PRODUCTIVE!

I thrive on remote teams, but time and time again people tell me they struggle. And not just older folks (after all, I’m one of those), but people of all ages, even your generation find working virtually with a remote team challenging.

Does this sound familiar? You emailed your remote team or posted on the message board, and there is nothing but TOTAL SILENCE. The deadline is looming, people committed to do the work, and you are now, for what seems like the millionth time, deciding whether or not to just do it yourself. Or do you make a last ditch effort to get a response from your team?

Remote teams usually start with lots of promise; there is a great group of motivated professionals who are excited to work together and tackle the task at hand. But somehow it seems that one or two people, if not most of the team, lose interest, begin to miss meetings, stop engaging, and leave the few with the lion’s share of the work. I know because it has happened to me.

I’ve been working on remote teams for more than a decade now with teams that have crossed international borders and various industries and sectors. It was difficult for me in the beginning, not because the team wasn’t engaged, but because I wasn’t engaged. As an extrovert, it was difficult for me to express myself online, and be patient for a response. But over the years, I’ve not only learned to be more effective working with remote teams, but to help my teams be more engaged and productive.

Many leaders and teams make the same fatal mistake, they assume everyone is on the same page and knows how to effectively work on remote teams. But the truth is, working virtually with remote teams is a skill.

I hear people say all of the time that it isn’t possible for remote teams to be as effective as teams that work together in person. But that isn’t always the case. Productive and successful teams have to be on the same page, whether they are working remotely or all together in the same physical space. But it is even more critical for remote teams because they may not have the benefit of connecting with each other face to face to brainstorm, hold one another accountable, and course correct.

So how do you get your team on the same page?

There are 5 Steps to Real Leadership, the second step is to imagine a shared vision with your team. This is an essential step to ensure you and your team is on the same page and invests and equally contributes to creating and realizing a shared vision.

Let’s face it, even the most self-directed ambitious professional can become easily disengaged working on a remote team.

Why?

When you work remotely:

There will always be a delayed response.
Innovation and collaboration require intention, patience, and creativity.
We prioritize what is right in front of us.
Introverts may flourish, while extroverts may retreat.

Don’t take anything for granted. When you are leading a remote team, these are factors that have to be considered. But that isn’t enough.

When a team comes together for the first time, even if you all know each other and have worked on other projects, real leaders have to:

Establish a shared vision
Create community agreements
Develop an action plan

What is a shared vision?

A shared vision is a vision that is co-created with leaders and their team that is built upon their shared values, interests, and purpose for the organization, team, or project. A shared vision provides a sense of purpose and direction, and is designed by the team, not imposed by the top. This helps to increase the team’s level of engagement and commitment to the vision because they are equally invested in realizing it.

Establishing a shared vision does not take a lot of time! It can be done in as quickly as 15 minutes just by asking a few key questions. And it is also possible to spend hours or even days developing a shared vision, it is entirely up to you as the leader to decide.

What are Community Agreements?

Community Agreements are specific behaviors (how we expect each other to act) the team creates and agrees to in order to foster a work environment that helps them achieve the shared vision. Remote teams will want to consider creating agreements around the following topics:

Use of Technology: Which platform is the primary platform, what are other tools used for, ie when do we call, text, Whatsapp etc
How much time do people have to respond to emails/posts?
How long of an absence can be forgiven?
What is the procedure when someone is unable to complete a task?
Is there a chain of command for decision making?
Documentation: What? Where? How?
How does the team manage and resolve conflict?

What is an Action Plan?

An action plan is simple, but rarely done! It is a document, a shared document, that outlines the teams goals, tasks, milestones, and deadlines. You may have an action plan, but it is likely that it could be more specific. To help, I’m giving you a FREE ACTION PLAN TEMPLATE for you to use with your team. It is part of the Real Leadership training materials designed to help teams not only create a shared vision, but deliver it.

It is possible for your remote team to be both engaging and productive. Whether it is you or your team, or both, that are struggling to feel engaged know that this can be remedied by taking these three easy steps.

If you want to know more about creating a shared vision with your team, or the 5 Steps to Real Leadership visit www.leadershipabq.com. Real Leadership Live 2019 will be Ma 2-4 in Albuquerque, New Mexico.

What is Mutual Mentoring? And it’s benefits?

November 29, 2018 by Tamara Leave a Comment

Bonnie came into my life when I was just 15 years old, and Debbie when I was almost 30. On the surface, these two women are seemingly quite different; Bonnie is a soft spoken free spirit, who is compassionate and open. Debbie is a firecracker; she is driven and passionate, and swears like a sailor. So what do they have in common? Both of these amazing and powerful women were my mentors, at two very critical times in my life. They inspired me to travel the world, explore my passions, and aim high. They taught me to listen, learn, and lead. Because of their mentoring, I was more willing to try new things and take more risks. And this year, I had the unexpected opportunity to reconnect with both of them. More importantly, I was able to thank them and tell them how their mentoring shaped my life and career. I am eternally grateful to have had such wonderful mentors, two people who were willing to share their wisdom and knowledge with me. What made them such amazing mentors? They treated me with respect and a sense of equity. They didn’t just recognize my potential, but the value I had at the time. It felt so good to have others recognize my talent and potential. It made me more willing and open to learning, and also possible for me to hear some hard truths. Their mentoring not only helped me with my career, but also inspired me to be a mentor and help others develop and grow their own careers. It has caused a continuous ripple effect that still expands as those who I’ve mentored become mentors themselves. But the critical lesson about their mentoring is that they were able to mentor me with respect and sense of equity. It was those values I carried with me when I began to formerly lead and mentor others. The easiest way to “turn off” a follower or mentee is to treat them like they aren’t capable. I learned from both experience and research, that we are able to have much more influence over others when they are treated as competent and valuable. And the more you do that, the more competent and valuable they become. In my Master’s thesis, I share the value of equity in intergenerational collaboration. And years later when I began to research and write about mentoring, I became certain that mutual mentoring is an invaluable tool for intergenerational collaboration. So what exactly is mutual mentoring? The technical definition is “a non-hierarchical developmental relationship based upon mutual reciprocity between two individuals”, which basically means a mentoring relationship where both parties act as mentor and mentee, recognizing that there is something to learn from each other. As organizations have struggled to understand your generation, develop strong multi-generational teams, and foster age inclusion, “reverse mentoring” began to trend. The idea was simple, bridge the generational gaps by having younger professionals mentor more seasoned professionals, typically on tech related skills. It’s a great idea but it ignores two critical factors:

More senior and seasoned professionals make great mentors and you want to be mentored. Research is conclusive that Millennials not only want to be mentored, but in fact, prefer access to senior manager to a raise. There is more to learn from young professionals than tech related skills.
Millennials, you have an entire breadth of knowledge and skills that are of value to even the most seasoned senior manager.

What do you (Xennials, Millennials, or GenZ) know that older folks don’t know? You have had access to the most recent research and innovations within your industry. You have learned to collaborate and work on diverse teams. You are wickedly resourceful and efficient, hard working, passionate, and driven AF. When I meet colleagues who tell me that they haven’t seen those qualities in their younger staff, I suggest it is for one of two reasons:

They hired the wrong person, one who just isn’t a fit for your organization.
They haven’t given them the freedom and space to shine.

Too often, your generation is being held back because some think “you have to pay your dues”. I hear this all the time. What dues? You did whatever it took to get the job so you should be able to do the job. And if you want to do more or move up, someone should tell you how that can happen. Real leaders create opportunities for their followers, not obstacles. The value former generations have about starting at the bottom to earn your way to the top is no longer relevant and helpful to an organizations bottom line. It is an incredibly poor use of resources to have talent within an organization sit around to wait their turn to “pay their dues”. This is archaic and one of the primary reason organizations are struggling to hold onto millennial talent. Mutual mentoring is a great option! When organizations encourage and support mutual mentoring, they create powerful learning relationships that strengthens their capacity and competitive edge. How? Mutual mentoring relationships:

Increase engagement and retention.
Build capacity by cross-training employees.
Support succession planning through knowledge sharing.

When people are able to enter into mentoring relationships with equity and share their individual talent and expertise, it creates learning and growth opportunities for everyone. When people are learning they are more engaged, and feel more valued and supported. All it takes is a willingness to be open to learning, and for everyone to accept that we all have more to learn and everyone has something to teach. To learn more about mutual mentoring and its benefits CLICK HERE to read the whitepaper.

How to Create a Learning Organization

September 13, 2018 by Tamara Leave a Comment

I have been in Dublin for more than a year now. The move to Ireland wasn’t just a career choice for my husband; it was fulfilling one of his lifelong dreams.

And the move has been amazing. Ireland is beyond beautiful; the green pastures, the stunning cliffs, and rocky shores never disappoint. And the people…they have been so kind and welcoming. It truly has been an unbelievable experience so far.

But I would be lying if I said there haven’t been moments when it hasn’t been so great.

In fact, there have been a few moments when I have wanted nothing more than to pack my bags and head back to New Mexico. As with anything in life, there have been some unexpected challenges.

With my work, I had planned to hit the ground running and I ended up hitting the ground with a great big THUD. It took more than a year to be able to establish a business here, which was a very unexpected complication. It was BEYOND frustrating.

I had anticipated making some adjustments on a personal level, but I hadn’t anticipated doing it professionally.

So over the last year there were times when I felt sad, mad, disappointed, and irritated…oooooh so irritated.

Now if you have seen my TEDx talk, you know that I’m up to the challenge of the unexpected, but being up to it doesn’t mean I am able to circumvent the range of emotions that come with it.

What it does mean is that I am able to adapt and change.

I am able to adapt and change because of the years of experience I have living and working around the world, and leading incredibly diverse teams. I’ve been able to develop the capacity to be resilient and flexible enough to adjust my plans and expectations.

It’s NOT easy. It takes effort and focus. But it makes all of the difference in the world.

Since my first experience abroad, I’ve been committed to increasing my ability to adapt which has required continuous growth and transformation. And real leaders do the same thing, for themselves and those they lead.

Real leaders find ways to transfer their knowledge and experience, and apply their own learning into their leadership. A great quote by Ralph Nader sums it up perfectly. He says, “The function of leadership is to produce more leaders, not more followers.”

Because let’s face it. Things change.

Whether you move across the globe or stay right where you are, change is inevitable. In fact, it is the one thing we can count on.

Real leaders understand and accept change not only as a reality, but as an opportunity. They create organizations that are able to adapt and change, and be both proactive and responsive to changes in our environment.

We are leading organizations in a rapidly changing environment, and we have to be able to be creative and innovative. So to help you in this endeavor, this video blog includes:

The 2 primary forces of change
The difference between change and transition
3 Steps you can take to foster a culture of learning in your organization (that won't cost you anything)

Watch the VLOG now:

DOWNLOAD this FREE CHECKLIST to help you define actions you can take to help your team transition and successfully embrace change.

And catch up on Parts 1-3:

Leadership Lesson 1: How to Craft Your Leadership Identity

Leadership Lesson 2: How to Create a Shared Vision

Leadership Lesson 3: How to Inspire People to Follow You

How to Inspire People to Follow You

September 5, 2018 by Tamara Leave a Comment

Humans are complicated! But understanding them is essential to real leadership. Eventbrite CEO, Julia Hartz said, “That seems to be my superpower-really understanding what motivates people.”

Do you understand what motivates people?

Too often we think people are only motivated by external rewards like pay raises, leave, flex schedules, or informal work environments. But those types of external drivers are superficial and will not help you become a more influential leader.

Real leaders understand what intrinsically motivates people, what drives them, what influences their behavior and decision making. That is a real SUPERPOWER!

Real leaders must invest in developing their emotional intelligence, cultural competence, and communication skills to truly understand how people think and why they behave the way that they do. This deep understanding of people is essential for influencing others and inspiring them to act.

Developing these skills will take time and training so I’ve put together this short video with 3 Easy Actions you can take immediately to help you increase your level of influence, and increase your team’s level of motivation, satisfaction, and engagement.

In the third video of this leadership series, you will learn:

The difference between managing and leading, and
3 Easy Actions (with examples) to inspire people to follow you

Watch this video:

DOWNLOAD this FREE WORKSHEET with 3 Active Listening Techniques to help your improve your listening and communication skills. You can use these techniques to learn to be less distracted and to be a more attentive and engaged.

Miss Part One or Two? No problem.

Watch Leadership Lesson 1: How to Craft Your Leadership Identity

Watch Leadership Lesson 2: How to Create a Shared Vision

Millennial Leaders!